Cocan't

Oh My News, The Independent , The New Zealand Herald and, yes, my favourite The London Paper all carry stories today about London being the cocaine capital of Europe.

According to a report by The European Monitoring Centre on Drugs and Drug Addiction (a mouthful for even the most sober among us), 6.8% of Londoners did cocaine between 2001-2003 compared to 4.8% in Spain, the next biggest nose hoovers. Apparently, young people between 16-25 are the biggest growing group to take the drug due to lowering prices and celebrity 'endorsement' from walking coat hangers Pete Doherty and Kate Moss. Well, what a surprise. Young people you say, doing drugs? And famous people? In London of all places? Smells like lazy journalism to me.

Every year there's some expose on drug taking in London, usually cocaine and what are the results? It's a drugs used by famous people and the media and makes you talk a lot. Well done.

In 2003, the BBC proclaimed London the 'crack capital' of England. The Evening Standard, meanwhile, loves to do undercover swab tests; revealing the use of cocaine at top London clubs like China White (named after a type of heroin) and London Fashion Week in 2005 (shock horror!) and then there's the constant fascination with Kate Moss doing the drug with this gem from the Mirror catching my eye:

As the white powder induces a sudden rush to her brain, she rocks back in her seat and laughs hysterically. The coke is kicking in.

Genius.

What do these exposes achieve? They certainly don't change people's behaviour towards cocaine as shown by the report and I don't think any celebrities are going to stop taking coke. How many times has Pete Doherty been up for drugs possession? It must be getting on for ten now. He's only been jailed once, and that was for burglary.

These pieces tell us nothing more about the drug. You'd have to be deaf and blind not to know that cocaine is taken by media types and makes you a bit chatty.

I went to the Notting Hill Arts Club tonight, once a favourite hang out of the Moss/Frost gang and spoke to Dom the front of house manager. He told me that all that comes from these types of pieces is a headache for him. Accompanying the Evening Standard's swab scandal article was a large picture of his club - not China White or Panageaa or any poncey West End clubs who might sue.

Thanks to that, the day after it was published the club was visited by the Drugs Prevention Agency and forced to rebuild the toilets so there were no flat surfaces and install (and pay) staff in the boys and girls to make sure there was no drug taking. The bar prices went up as a result.

The Arts Club is a small, cosy club, which doesn't make a lot of money. It's no China White and I'm very grateful for this. It puts on good bands, allows local artists to exhibit for free and doesn't charge on the door before 8pm.

Dom freely acknowledged that he can't stop people taking cocaine if they're determined to. Any idiot knows a lack of flat surface is not going to stop a hungry nose. He and his staff do their utmost to prevent drug taking and it's not fair to punish a small community club on the evidence of a few swabs. The worse thing about it, he said, is that the hypocrites at the Associated Press (Evening Standard's parent company) drink in a bar down Kensington Church Street, which is known for being rife with the stuff. Perhaps someone should turn the tables on the journalists and do a swab test in their bar.

It's a classic case of making a story out of nothing, almost wagging the dog. The classic user of cocaine isn't your street gangster or model, it's a sub editor up late trying to put together the morning issue.

And in other irritating news: Guardian comment writers have issued a
manifesto listing points right and fair comment writers should follow. Surely the point of comment is that it's your own opinion, as rude and partisan as you feel fits the piece. In fact, politicising the issue of race and religion ("we need to have a national conversation about race") makes an issue where there need not be. The whole thing smacks of self-righteousness.