Signs of the times - It's all comment, folks!

This blog is dead. It is an ex-blog

2008-12-17T10:07:00.000-08:00

Moved to drymouth.tumblr.com

I work with Optimus Prime

2007-12-19T09:53:00.001-08:00

He has too much tech

Morrissey's NME litigation

2007-12-04T04:54:00.000-08:00

Morrissey can be an awkward bloke, no question. And his reluctance to explain his lyrics combined with the brief love England, skinhead image he portrayed has meant the Morrissey is racist campaign has been boiling on for nigh fifteen years now.

I'm not a fan of the NME and so am biased towards pretty much any attack of eloquence upon them. But I think I'm justified in feeling slightly sick at their attempt to dredge up the spurious racism allegations against Morrissey. I enjoyed reading his reply to NME, especially his criticism of the '"cheers mate, got pissed last night, ha ha" interviews that clutter every single issue of the "new" NME'. Reminded me of Kele's attack on Oasis making 'stupidity hip'.

They claim to be inspired by the Beatles but, and this so saddens me, they have failed to grasp that the Beatles were about constant change and evolution. Oasis are repetitive Luddites.

It seems that whenever a band dares to say anything remotely intelligent (not preaching, make no mistake I don't think every band should be Bono. Shudder) they're either at best mocked, at worst accused of something like this.

Even the Guardian mocked Kele (Bloc Party attacks Oasis with thesaurus) for saying something that I believe really needed to be said about the dumbing down of British music.

I look forward to a typical NME attack on the 'past it' artist.

How to make me quickly irate

2007-11-09T11:02:00.000-08:00

Can what? Urinate in a public place? Burn yourself in a religious protest? Insert graffiti into a sign that is practically begging for it? Damn, where's my pen...

Hoa Nails

2007-11-09T11:00:00.000-08:00

I'm not shoa I want hoa nails?

It's A Knockout

2007-11-09T09:05:00.000-08:00

Spent Monday running, jumping and wheezing in a publicity affair promoting the new Wii Mario and Sonic Go To The Olympics. Like child's party meets sports day it was compered by Stuart Hall himself who kept a running commentary through megaphone sometimes breaking out in some fierce MC-ing. At least, I hope the stuttering effect stemmed from intentional means.

The suits smelt of vomit - I suspect they were the original 70s Its A Knockout Props, saturating with generations of overwhelmed child's excretion.

Team Mario won with able help from the Stuff boys and some retarded flapping about from me.

More photos at UK Resistance. Mario doesn't look so hot cos someone got overexcited from the winning team, forgot an actual person was inside the costume and whacked him over the head with a bottle of prize champagne.

New toys...

2007-10-02T14:05:00.000-07:00

Back after over a month of work is far too long in blogging land. After playing Bestival on the Isle of Wight, I quickly found myself in a warzone. NATO forces play war games twice a year in the North Atlantic on an exercise called Neptune Warrior and I was fortunate enough to be invited along to play simulation embedded press on the warships. From futuristic scanning devices used by crack boarding forces to full Lynx helicopters, there were enough big toys to keep me happy and enough intrigue around the excellently detailed faux political scenario to keep me in awkward questions, "just what is an acceptable level of collateral damage" for the whole thing. In fact, it was a journalist's dream and brought me to an understanding and an admiration of the people that make up our armed forces that I think very few people have. It's much too tempting to look at the whole bulk as some brutish beast of political power, whereas the sharp and thinking people I met are a world away from the either lunkish or sycophantic visions of a military person one usually encouters. Although, it might be just the navy lads and officers I met.

While I was away I celebrated my birthday, ably helped by HMS Lancaster's stellar officers (wearing my cap as I type!). Orange and I are to part company later this week - we're back connected but it conks out every two days and I have to manually reset the modem and change all my IP addresses. So to treat myself, a new phone and contract, sod the cancellation charges.

BUT OH THE CHOICE! After the iphone brick debacle, I had a rather sour taste in my mouth about the jesus phone. But then today I finally touched one and boy did it seep into my conciousness, the smooth lines, the shiny screen, the mmmmmmmulti touch. And yet, nags the practical killjoy in my head, wouldn't the N95 be a much more sensible choice? 3g, 5mp camera, open to all the natty little third party apps I can shake a brick at. I've got two weeks until I'm paid. Two long, dark weeks of soul searching....

Course, I could just go and blow it all on a new processor refitted Xbox 360 (codename falcon so much awesome)... Halo 3 and ROCK BAND out later this year.

Sleep on it, I think.

Decisions, decisions

2007-08-24T06:09:00.000-07:00

The Xbox 360 Elite is out. For one hundred squids cheaper than the ps3 it's got a cavernous 120gb drive. But no HD DVD player to the ps3's Blu Ray drive and no wi-fi.

I've been in a quandary of indecision about my next console purchase. I have been of the Xbox camp for two years now, forgoing the pleasures of Guitar Hero until its FAR TOO LATE release for the 'box and various other silly, girly, party-type games. Why? One reason, Halo. And the release of Halo 3 on my birthday, Sep 26 *hint hint*, has seen me planning my Halo 3 themed party for so many months I'm not allowed to speak of it in front of my nearest and dearest for fear of ear aching retribution.

And yet, and yet... I'm so confused and let down by the absence of an HD player. Why, Microsoft, why? You could have made the biggest splash by coming down on the HD side of the DVD wars and regained some of the awesome gaming credibility that's started to erode since 2005.

Only Halo 3 is keeping this relationship together. However, if anyone wants to know what to get me for my birthday, I could end up having both...

Cannabis in Kenton, shock horror...

2007-08-24T04:47:00.001-07:00

An old report from the Wesminster News Online archives with me in 'serious reporting' mode. A lack of tech stories that day, I believe. Watch for the naughty edit at the end...

At least someone's watching me

2007-08-23T02:10:00.000-07:00

My bedroom review of the new O2 Cocoon phone got two of linkage. One from google vids, obviously, but another from the O2 Cocoon blog.

Generally I like the phone, especially its design, so very 80s with blue LEDs - and everyone knows blue LEDs are so much awesome.

But the storage is only 2GB (upgradable to 4) and that's just not good enough these days.

O2 woo Ru

2007-08-22T08:35:00.001-07:00

News that O2 look to be the first UK carriers of the iphone has reached my more-open-than-usual-ears.

Sure, I won't be getting 2-4-1 at the cinema if I leave Orange or free internet...*snorts of insane laughter*, but first dibs at gigs and the most anticipated phone since old Mr. Fleming said "I've got this idea..." might just woo me over.

Plural-sy

2007-08-22T08:30:00.000-07:00

By far the greatest crime against grammar is that of the correct use of the plural. I've given up on my rages against free CD's, local MP's and cash machines's as it's a losing battle. However, I was pleased to see this article by Michael Williams of the Independent on Sunday showing that it's not just me and the BBC who care.

An update and some paedantry

2007-08-21T09:37:00.000-07:00

Spoke to Kelly on Friday who said we should be back online. We weren't. Then spoke to Sam, who promised to 'enter me on his management spreadsheet' and that we'd get a call on Monday. No call. He also promised me compensation. I laughed. Heartily. Well, as close as I could get with the scooped out hole where my heart used to be.

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I wonder what this chap's "really" offering and what his "real" name is...

The colour of rage...is Orange

2007-08-16T03:49:00.000-07:00

I admit, I've been a fool. When I changed to Orange I was bedazzled by offers of unlimited free calls to an Orange number, Orange Wednesdays, but most...by their free internet offer with a £35 a month contract.

I have had no internet since the 31st July 2007 - why? Ask Orange but don't expect an explanation.

Voted worst ISP by BBC Watchdog in 2007, Orange have a history of long, prolonged outages.

They are members of ISPA but if your internet is provided free as part of your mobile package your broadband is not covered by the ISPA!

You have to complain to CISAS but they will only look at your case if the ISP has not resolved the problem after 3 months! 3 months without internet?

I'm off to Virgin...except I'm in an 18 month contract with big penalties to pay if I close the account so I remain tied to the fruit for a further 6 months.

The story so far...

Apart from the inconveniences to my social life, not to mention my working life (I have to go into an internet cafe to work, incurring charges and usually unwanted conversation/invitations) the process of "fixing" the problem has been a Brazil-style vortex of circular motion that would make even Yossarian's head spin.

Moreover it has upset my elderly mother who runs a business from our home - and, by crikey, if anyone upsets my mum there's going to be fisticuffs.

We phone Orange on at least a daily basis yet clear information is rarer than a still mooing steak. To date no-one can tell us why the problem cannot be resolved and when it might be.

First came a line test - this took a week. Then we were told it was not an individual line or account issue. Rather it was supposedly a failure or breakdown of Orange's technology within BT exchanges. It was, apparently, affecting very many customers (they couldn't say a number at this point).

Rather than owning up to a major crash, Orange appeared to be attempting to treat each case as a separate issue to avoid a clear and truthful admission of failure. As their recorded message continues to bleat out "connections may be slow but Orange know of no other problems". This is clearly untrue.

Then we were told that an engineer would call. Waiting patiently, this failed to transpire on the 6th, 8th, 9th and 10th when we called on each day. On 11th August we were informed that engineers are not available but 'Leena' assured us that an engineer would call us on the 12th. They didn't. We were later told by 'Istu' that 'Leena' hadn't logged this call so it didn't officially exist and that she 'had lied to you' (his words) as no engineers were available that day.

13th August: having had no call, we phoned up to complain and find out the address for complaints. We were passed from department to deparment, being told Orange have no formal complaints procedure. We finally ended up at the Escalation department where we were told that we would not receive a response if we sent a letter in (which we did anyway) as 'we don't do that'.

At this point we were also told that, no, it wasn't affecting any other Orange customers, it was just us and they would have to send an engineer over. But we wouldn't hear anything for 48 hours.

15th August: we're told the problem is affecting 60 subscribers.

16th August: a forty minute, heated phone call with Istu produces these results. Our complaint log, apparently, had been closed (meaning no action was taking place on it) and was only opened when they received our complaint on 15th August. This was partly due to Leena's 'lies' on the 11th. So...we have to start all over again with the process.

The problem is an LLU (Local Loop Unbundling) problem and is affecting 60-100 users. Apparently this does not make it a 'major problem'.

Currently we have been promised that an engineer will check the line in 48 hours. Yes, even though the line was checked at the beginning of August, because our complaint has 're-opened our log' we have to start from the beginning.

So thanks, Orange, and thanks to your team of unhelpful, script-reading, pass the buck staff. I present to you the leading cast (not including bit part players early on in our journey)...

03/08 Juanita
04/08 Rohit
04/08 Chinpas
05/08 Hari
05/08 Lisa
06/08 Hayman
06/08 Kelly (promises us someone will call on the 8th with 'good news'. No-one calls)
09/08 Kelly (says we will receive no calls and there is no timescale for resolution)
10/08 Paul
10/08 Kim
10/08 Rob (who has no record of our problem...)
11/08 Leena (aka 'the liar')
12/08 Samir (who says it's an error on the line, even though engineers say it's not)
12/08 Nik (Says 60 people also affected, we could be connected on Wed 15th)
15/08 Ranya (promises a 'positive outcome' in 24 hours)
15/08 Sam (says it can take up to 4 weeks, offers dial up account)
16/08 Kelly (we have to wait 48 hours for any news, she cuts us off)
16/08 Darius (can't connect us with Kelly, claims no way of emailing her)
16/08 Julie
16/08 Istu (of the escaltion specialist team, says no letters have been received)
17/08 Kelly (we would receive a technical call on Monday(we didn't))
22/08 John and Paul of the escalation dept (promised the world)

If this b3ta post is anything to go by, I'm sure you're working hard at my problem.

The moral: if it seems to good to be true, it's probably Orange.

Thanks to Agitprop and James Jin for the photo

Black Rock Article

2007-08-03T09:05:00.000-07:00

Published today in Big City Redneck. Not my subbing!

2007-08-02T08:17:00.001-07:00

A bit of back research through Rob Field's excellent site Bold As Love brought me this article called 'Whites Only Party' by Kandia Crazy Horse. It's intrinsically racist, she says, to point out a black person at a rock gig and remark thereupon. It's hard enough to be a black person who likes the music he/she's not proscribed to like without everyone pointing it out. I can see her point and certainly, this is probably why I'm much more interested in the subject than my lead singer who tends to shy away from discussions of her colour, although she revels in discussing race in a general sense. However, I've always been taught to confront race head on and, even if I'm doing it clumsily, I'd rather point out my colour and the colour of those around me than adopt that annoying and patronising white habit of pretending 'not to notice'. Even worse, there are those who tut me from bringing up race as an issue, telling me that it's all equal now. Kandia and Rob both rightly believe there's still a lot to fight for and be angry about.

Music still segregated

2007-08-01T07:57:00.000-07:00

This summer, between working an *exciting* research job and recording with the band, I'm making a radio documentary about the resurgence in Black Rock Music. Resurgence, you say? Well, yes. Bands like The Thirst, Noisettes, Ebony Bones, Test Icicles (r.i.p) and of course Bloc Party.

Interviewing some stellar people like Skin, Soul 2 Soul, Dotun Adebayo and Rob Fields from the Black Rock Coalition has given me hope that the music industry might get over that long worn fallacy, 'black people don't like rock', however many times my (rock) band is put on the urban or 'ethnic' stage. The time we went on after a group of delegates from the Pakistani foreign ministry is a story I'll save for another time... And yet it seems that a black person in a band suddenly shifts journalists into euphemism mode - rather than being a rock or indie band you're 'funky' or 'soulful'. What they're trying to say is 'black'. By and large, the people I've interviewed have been positive and hopeful that the cross pollination in music will bear mixed race fruit. But one only has to look at the rock n roll scene of the 1950s, the prog scene of the late 1960s and the ska/punk scene of the late 1970s to see that it's white folk that come to dominate.

Here's an article soon to be published for bigcityredneck.co.uk

When my band, Mama Shamone, got the call that we were playing industry festival In The City we jumped around the room with grins of not-yet-jaded glee, but the jumps were tempered in height by the now familiar qualifier: we were playing the urban stage. Again.

We're a punk rock band consisting of two girls, two boys, two black, two white. Pretty egalitarian, but, of course we’re described as a band of colour: ‘heavy metal Tina Turner’; ‘Black Blondie’ are just two of the terms often applied. There’s no point in getting sensitive about it – bands are pigeon holed from the very first lazy journalist’s question: ‘so what are your influences’ – but it got me thinking one day as we played the Brick Lane Festival.

Rocking out on the ethnic and world music stage I looked on enviously at the Vice bar rocking with the sounds of Dead Kids and Selfish Cunt. These were our peers, not the slightly baffled looking families in the front row who had come to see the African men's choir following us.
In a music scene where crossover is king and the urban scene is pretty mixed, we're still ridiculously segregated in the world of rock and indie. The media seem to lose their minds when a black person picks up a guitar and suddenly words like 'funky' and 'soulful' start creeping into reviews: used by writers euphemising 'black'.

It would be naive, however, to pretend that we're all colour blind. Kele Okereke of Bloc Party has complained that the media have hounded him about his colour (and sexuality but that's another article) and yet on the second album a significant batch of lyrics are devoted to exploring his racial identity. Perhaps this is just venting in response to the more naff cries of 'look - an indie band with a black man!', but as far as his race informs his experience, his colour have influenced the band. Similarly with Ebony Bones' cover of 'Mind Your Own Business' resounding with the refrain 'no blacks, no Irish, no dogs'. A friend, playing devil's advocate, pointed out to me the other day that, like it or not, the name Mama Shamone 'sounded black'. The stereotypes may be contemptible but if social consciousness believes it to be true, then it becomes truth.

There has been a significant resurgence in black British rock bands over the last few years: Noisettes, Test Icicles, Ebony Bones, The Thirst, and of course Bloc Party. Over the course of the summer I am making a radio documentary exploring this and asking at once: why now and not before? Typically, I get one of four responses:

Black People Don't Like Rock

It's surprising how often I hear this from all colours. It's blatantly untrue, but the fallacy holds not a little sway about how music is segregated.

“My black friends think I’m mad”, laughs Sonia, a black Queens of the Stone Age fan I met on late night drunken bus trip recently. She thinks it's a mixture of people not wanting to step outside their typical peer group - something common to all colours - and a deeper religious mistrust of rock music as 'depressing' or 'evil'. At the recent Lovebox festival I spoke to Soul 2 Soul's MC Chickaboo, who confirmed this opinion - 'in the Caribbean, people like happy music - rock's not viewed as that'.

As cultures mix and deep Christian faith is less commonplace, rock may filter through.

Discrimination

‘Elvis wasn’t my king’ wrote Helen Kolawole in the Guardian on the twenty-fifth anniversary of the rock n roller's death. To her Elvis ‘epitomises the theft of black people’s music and dance’. There’s no denying that rock originated with black musicians. How many times have we heard the John Lennon quote that the Beatles were simply stealing from the black rhythm and blues artists?

During the 70s and 80s, punk saw more black people involved in rock: Polystyrene from X Ray Spex, Barry Adamson from Magazine, while over in the US the punk attitudes of Bad Brains. Yet it was Madness and the Clash that charged ahead, taking the reggae and ska influences and reaping the rewards. Have the white folks stolen what is rightfully black music?

The record industry claimed for ages there wasn't a market for black rock, indeed take a fine tooth comb to the 90s and the pickings are small: Skunk Anansie in the UK and Fishbone in the US or Living Color. But there's an argument that the industry didn't push black rock either because of a perceived lack of a market or a kind of racism.

During their 80s/90s career Living Color found themselves continually put on as an RnB band even though they grew out of lead singer Vernon Reid's involvement in the Black Rock Coalition, an organisation dedicated to promoting black artists in rock. They are still struggling to find that elusive black rock audience on a significant scale.

The music industry may still be as discriminatory as ever, indeed, it even works the other way: 1xtra consciously don't interview white actors at movie premieres even though their remit is to be 'urban' not 'black'. Yet the industry may just be running out of gimmicks and the appeal of a black lead singer in a rock band appeals in money terms just as Eminem was the white kid who opened up the hip hop market to a flood of white rednecks.

Social Mobility

As I walked around Lovebox I noted some of the legendary acts on the programme: Don Letts, Toots and the Maytals, Soul 2 Soul and I noted the location - deepest Hackney - but I saw very few black faces among the crowd. Perhaps it was a class thing. The middle classes tend to be white and the middle classes can afford tickets to festivals at £35 a day.

Rock is also dominated by the middle classes, which possibly explains Kele Okereke's indie star status: it's far more to do with him being a well educated middle class boy than anything else. The UK is still a place paralysed by class prejudice and that's reflected in its music. On the council estates it's grime, garage and two step you'll hear, while the private school kids drinking cider on Barnes Village Green are bound to be listening to indie bands.

As black people rise up the class ladder perhaps we'll see more at rock concerts.

The Ipod Generation

The crossover kids, the 'mash up' crew, whatever you want to call them, the under 25s are listening to music in a completely different way. And shuffle has a lot to answer for. "I think it's a natural progression" says Sonia, "more people are mixing and so the music mixes up too". Artists like Lethal Bizzle and Dizzee Rascal are enough to testify that rock riffs are being looked on as something new to mix in, but will it encourage a new generation of black kids to pick up guitars rather than mics?

Rob Fields, former PR executive for the Black Rock Coalition hopes that rock can be brought back to black.

“The conundrum of Black rock is that the most obvious audience for this music is Black people. So, the question for me is not how to market the music to black folks, but how to bring more black folks to the music. Not only would it create more demand for the music, but it would change lives.”

Until then, my band will be playing an urban stage near you.

Ruth is currently making a documentary about black rock music. If you would like to take part or comment contact her at ruthblackrock@googlemail.com.

The future for David Cameron

2007-06-22T05:53:00.000-07:00

Another day, another panel. This time I was in attendance at the Royal Institute of British Architects for a discussion put on by the Daily Telegraph and Editorial Intelligence entitled - 'David Cameron, can he crack it?'. Chaired by Kirsty Lang, the panel consisted of Daily Telegraph columnist and would be BBC flogger, Simon Heffer; Peter Kellner, President of YouGov; Nick Clegg, Lib Dem MP; Shami Chakrabarti, Director of Liberty and Ed Vaizey, Tory MP.

The debate was a lot of Cameron bashing and adoring, much playing for laughs, which still didn't discourage some sleepers at the back. The guest list was a long list of big players and it was significant that no-one really seemed sure who this Cameron character really was. He would be hard to draw from memory with no characteristic features for the eye to recognise. Does this represent ambivalence? Or have we just not seen him in all his glory yet?

Ms Chakrabarti was characteristically diplomatic and focused. She expressed her gratitude for Cameron's opposition to ID cards and the longer detention of terror suspects, while applauding attempts to encourage more women and diversities in the Conservative party. But she warned of his 'incoherent' trashing of the Human Rights Act. While the appeal for more diversity in the Tory party is clear box ticking, the Human Rights dismissal and the rejection of ID cards is clear Telegraph reader wooing, hope against hope that the old school of Tories won't jump ship. It put Ms Chakrabarti in an odd position, not unnoticed by her, being in agreement with Simon Heffer. 'Simon might not be happy about that' she impishly noted.

Her key point was that we need to know a bit more about Cameron's underpinning philosophy. 'I wish politics were a little bit more ideological. We need to know what Cameron believes' she said. She identified the big Cameron test as when Gordan Brown goes hard right on security to confound Cameron and woo the disillusioned hardcore Tory voters. The rival traditions in his party like Europhile/phobe, libertarian/authoritarian will only be united by the attraction of freedom of rule after ten years of seemingly authoritarian action from Blair.

A highlight of the Q&A session was when Peter Hitchins in the audience described the Tory party ads a ghost brand, 'like Woodbines or the Daily Express'.

Ed Vaizey retaliated by expressing sadness that, in a previous question, an old Kinnock crony had shown support for Cameron, but here was 'an old Marxist' knocking David.
'I'm not a Marxist anymore, Ed' Hitchins corrected.
'Yes, you move around - a true man of principle, Peter' cheeked Vaizey.

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My colleague David Heathfield has had a film he made using some of my shots of the military posted on Iain Dale's (one of the audience members at the above panel) Diary. Here's the link to the film standalone

Lessons from the Falklands

2007-06-18T14:14:00.000-07:00

The weekend was the time to be a tourist in London, taking snaps of the Trooping of the Colour and the Falklands commemorations. The week of Falklands memories started for me at the Imperial War Museum with a talk given by Robert Fox, Brian Hanrahan, Michael Nicholson and Sir David Ramsbotham, the army's public relations officer during the conflict (nicknamed 'Rambo').

Having studied the Falklands war for a university project, I already knew how unprepared the forces was for a press presence. They simply didn't have a policy on how to deal with journalists: what to tell them, where to put them, how to communicate with them. The military was wholly and totally unprepared for press. The first journalists to sail with the navy were only six - and none were defence correspondents, unthinkable nowadays.

Brian Hanrahan told us how he just 'packed and left' with no idea behind the thinking and no experience at all in military matters. These days the BBC won't put a journalist near a conflict zone without a hostile environments course. The navy, as the most 'old school' and traditional of the forces, said at first they wouldn't take anyone. It was Margaret Thatcher of all people who said they must.

Robert Fox was told to go and watch the ships leave but received a late call telling him to pop along. The distrust of the navy was such that one commander said, 'keep the media out of it, if they're lucky, we'll tell them who won'. Michael Nicholson interjected at this point revealing that the last published 'regulations for correspondents' at that time (1982) was originally written in 1052 in the aftermath of the Suez crisis. Nobody had thought to update it as media relations was not a part of military strategy.

How different from now; just think of the media coverage of the commandos captured by the Iranians or the Abu Ghraib scandal - media control is crucial to winning a war.

I recently took part in a military exercise up in the Highlands and, although the military types we met were all friendly and generally well disposed towards the media, how true it rang when Brian Hanrahan recalled an Admiral who believed that the media were aboard his ship purely for distributing propaganda. As a journalist you are viewed by the military as part of the Military of Defence: you are only here through the courtesy of the military, so you better keep your mouth shut. This has a practical point as Mike Nicholson gives an example: if a journalist describes his surroundings as 'foggy' for atmosphere's sake, the enemy only has to look for the foggy area to get a good idea of your position. It's your life at stake as well as everyone on the ship.

However, the journalist has a duty to his readers, listeners and viewers to give a true picture, not propaganda. To describe the bawdiness and sometimes bizarre rituals of sailors before a battle, might not be to the taste of the military PR, but it makes our forces more human, more understandable to those back home and they will be much more accepting if things go wrong.

The journalist has to be careful and thoughtful when describing conflict. One's instinct might be to file the report immediately and escape censorship. With satellite technology this is becoming very possible. But Sir Ramsbotham disagreed hotly: 'it's not that simple. What you're seeing might not be what you think. Take Fallujah, for example'.

He also flagged up how blogging has introduced a completely new angle into war correspondence. The media have been blamed for giving away military routes in Iraq when, in fact, it was actually emails and blogs. Blogs can be important. Long before the official investigation, an anonymous forward interrogator was writing about abuse of villagers going to a prison called Abu Ghraib.

The line of information is as powerful as the line of force and, according to Ramsbotham, training is changing for this new world. In the Gulf, when British commandos were kidnappers, what happened was that the Iranians were in a spectrum of confrontation to conflict. Our government has got to be more intelligent when it comes to media management. Who's the best at spin, asked Robert Fox, 'not the West, but the man with the sad eyes, sitting in a cave in Pakistan: Osama Bin Laden'.

Even positive stories can be harmful, if they're not thought through. Brian Hanrahan described a story about how successful the British bomb disposal team had been in the Falklands. When the Argentinians read it, they discovered that was a problem with the fuses in their bombs and promptly fixed it. Ships were sunk. Information control in wars needs to be handled differently than the usual way the government damage handles. They save ministers' careers first when they should be saving lives.

Embedding journalists works for everyone. When journalists are allowed to mix with troops and report (with sensible restrictions) it keeps everyone honest. Said Brian Hanrahan: 'Our troops are mostly good people doing a good job - if journalists are scattered in amongst them it keeps them like that, rather than leaving the temptation to go wrong.'

Pictures

1: the panel chaired by Peter Snow
2: sailors onboard the flagship Ark Royal
3: Ark Royal, sailing up the Thames for the Falklands celebrations (more pictures here, courtesy of Victoria Cook)
4: me sailing towards Ark Royal

Polite racism, Engrish and an extra 'p' with your accomodation

2007-06-11T18:36:00.000-07:00

This isn't really paedentry, but I found the inscription on this Japanese insect catching box quite charming. I like delicate nature too, especially when I'm wrenching it out of its accustomed habitat. And intellcetual? Possibly a very close relationship with a computer?

Ah, the Hoops. At least we say please in the Bush. It's fewer Aussies, actually.

Estate agents, even more hated than journalists. But who knew it was due to their appalling spelling?

Portmanteau words occur twice in today's posting. I'm usually quite fond of these little time wasters; good for pub talk, general silliness and sometimes used by more talented writers than me for a more powerful evocation,
Twas brillig and the slithey toves etc..

But the desperate creation of new terms to describe apparently new scenes, new creations, new variants on the usual vomit of fashion cascading from in joke to high street, painfully forced from the pens of, yes, journalists, keen to secure a 'first coined by' entry in the OED - they're a bit sad, really, no?.

One that caused mass emesis in January was 'Blipsters' - black hipsters, first used in the New York Times to describe black indie fans. Nauseating

Even worse are variations on a rotting theme, such as last Saturday's Independent description of a 'new wave' (another new wave) of young British actors called 'The Mac Pack', just because the writer needed to clutch the coattails of the already mangled 'Rat Pack' and 'Brat Pack' and 'Brit Pack'. The connection came because one of the new faces' surnames began with 'Mc'.

And 'Paedentry'? Smacking of a smug and smarmy school days dictionary? Pathetic.

More signs

2007-05-20T15:48:00.000-07:00

Incorrect apostrophes.

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What are they teaching in schools?

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Take away or eat queer?

Working five till five

2007-02-06T17:32:00.000-08:00

It's two in the morning and I'm sitting in Fort Knox, sorry, Television Centre. I don't have a pass so I have to be accompanied by a colleague every time I go to the loo. It's a bit like prison but without the hideous conditions, risk of murder, curtailing of liberty, free drugs... in fact it's nothing like prison.

Another straight in there and away you go for this week at Five Live - "you write cues?", right off you go, then. I may not be reading them but I get a little buzz from having my scripts read out. Or that might be the coffee. Probably the coffee, actually. I'm working 9-1pm at Editorial Intelligence and then 5pm-5am at Up All Night.

I'm thinking of next week's television project with a mixture of excitement and dread. Excitement for getting my mitts on some nice equipment and all the geeky vices that will involve. Dread for the inevitable presenter cliches I'm sure will crop up. There's a style of presenting and newsreading fashionable in TV at the moment that I've come to loathe. It's FRESH, it's FUNKY and it's FULL of RANDOM! emphaSIS! and redundant EXCLAMATION marks! It also assumes that the viewer has an attention span of a goldfish, the memory of a fruitfly and a need to be WOKEN UP every two seconds with a flashing graphic or naff sound effect.

Here's my new IDEA- a new MYPODBLOG MULTI-360 INTERACTIVE HIT called NewsSLAP!

NewsSLAP - a five minute vomit of the week's news edited by an online collective consisting of a four year old child, an epilectic and an ADD sufferer.

It's presented by a thirty-five year old ex-children's presenter with spikey blonde hair who knows how to have fun with the NEWS. Lots of different camera angles, edits to cut out the space between words (who has time for THAT?) and enough whip-pans to make an astronaut vom.

Delivery is in-your-face, full of jokes to liven up the boring old news and every sentence ends with a long drawn out word with a downwards caaaadeeeence. One hundred different shots are crammed into five minutes with lots of flashing graphics, text and ironically amateurish stop-camera animation to make Jeremy Paxman dance to techno music. It's sooooo YouTube, so UCG, so now!

Baby surfs on cat! Wacky students dress up as ovaries! Suicide bomber kittens! 65% of pensioners eat own legs!

Some serious stuff is happening in the Miiiidle Eaaaast. It's veeeeery saaaaad so presenter pulls a saaaad face.

Of course it's completely downloadable-interactive-wiki-editable and has an online poll at the end of the show to decide whether the presenter should read the news next week in the style of James Brown or dressed as a kumquat.

Should be a hit.

2007-02-02T09:53:00.000-08:00

I woke up to hear Tony Blair in my dreams this morning. The interview on this morning’s Today programme, I think, will be analysed over and over again both before his resignation and after. Here is a Prime Minister on the rocks and boy, how it sounds in his voice. Shaking, evasive answers from a man who is trying to cover his tracks and build his statue at the same time.

He kept bringing the interview back to his good works with children and, of course, to criticising the media (“you guys at the Today programme”). John Humphreys hit back with an echoing quote of TB's "I'm a pretty straight kind of guy" in response to the Ecclestone funding scandal.

I must admit I still carry a naive journalistic ambition to highlight people and places that I think don’t get the coverage they deserve, but Humphreys got it exactly right when he said the media is about personalities. Whether we talk about the health service, Iraq, cash for peerages, it’s about Tony Blair, not what he or his government are doing. It’s become solely about the man. Ten years ago I think Tony would have welcomed that with open arms, during this interview he tried to detract attention away from himself throwing hospitals, schools and the like out as he retreated.

The interview sounded like a flawed elegy to his career interrupted constantly by a show-stealing heckler.

Britain is focused singularly on one man and how to get rid of him in the quickest possible way. We may end up with someone worse but it’s hard to see past the man who has disappointed us so greatly.

I went to see Babel last night at the flicks. I had heard three things about it before I paid my money: it was anti-American; it was sexist and it was a load of lefty rubbish. I found it to be none of these things.

I thought all the Americans portrayed came off very well. Even American border guards, who are so often representative as fascist and sadistic came across simply as men doing their job, and even vaguely compassionate as far as their job allowed.

Everyone knows you don’t joke with airport or border guards no matter which country you’re entering. Santiago (Gael Garcia Bernal) who recklessly drives over the Mexican/American border with his aunt and her young wards in tow is utterly to blame for what happens next.

Richard, played by Brad Pitt, was compassionate, loving, incredibly patient considering his wife might die and it absolutely baffles me how anyone could see his portrayal as anti-American. When he lashes out, it’s out of fear and if the film had any message at all it wasn’t left, right, up or down. The film was a realistic representation of fear in a world that’s terrified of everything.

Fear informs all the actions in the film. Santiago is afraid of being caught, Chieko is afraid of being alone, Richard is afraid of losing his wife… Even the most unpleasant character in the film, the Englishman on the coach who demands they leave Richard and Susan is motivated only by fear that he might die too.

An American woman is shot in a Muslim country. Of course everyone assumes it’s a terrorist attack; it’s not a right or wrong assumption - it’s just true and possibly likely in any other case. This unique film has stuck in my head over the last few days and has deepened my respect for Iñárritu.

My last day at World Have Your Say is a sad one. I’ll miss the team: Ros peering at me over his glasses; Hasit and Rabiya giggling over lunch; Christiane doing her bit for Germany’s sense of humour; Paul and his distinctly Scottish rendering of ‘Weeerrrrld Have Your Say’; Richard’s bounce; David and his sudden smiles; Peter’s dry-as-the-Sahara wit; Rozita’s surprising naughty side and lovely, lovely, lovely Anna who took the time to answer all my stupid questions. I’ll also miss the regular callers and emails, with whom you build up quite a relationship and who, sometimes, restore a sliver of faith in human friendship: Steve in Virginia; Abelillah in Morocco and his essays and most of all Wisdom in Nigeria.

Today’s big news is the report on climate change and global warming by two and a half thousand boffins who are descending on Paris to discuss it. The BBC are having a debate on it at Have Your Say and my favourite comment runs thusly:

"What surprises me is people are prepared to worship a god they've never seen, based purely on faith with no evidence except that 'claimed' by religious organisations, and yet are so ready to question, and in many cases, contemptuously dismiss obvious climate change evidence and the destruction of Earth's ecological balance, because it impinges on their 'lifestyle' choices, or profits." Alex Stone

I’m at Five Live, Up All Night next week working nights and working my second job in the daytime. Who needs sleep?

Typso

2007-01-31T06:02:00.000-08:00

I've been unable to write the blog for the last few days and address the comments left, so this entry will be a bit of a mecha-beast. First things first...

These are my personal views and not those of the BBC.

I was surprised/interested by the generally hostile tone of the comments left to my last post. I had tried to reflect my thoughts in a tone that would as accurately as possible express my willingness to learn. I hope what comes across in this blog is my learning process as I stumble over various opinions and world views.

So, from Lou Minatti's comment:

There you go again with your label gun. It's easy to label people. It doesn't require you to think.

I think I should have put quotation marks around 'right-wingers' as it was an echo of Debbie Schlussel's blog entry 'Hate & Intolerance Tries to Silence the Right of Far Left'.

This I think implies that the far left try and silence anyone 'right' of their views. I think I'm justified in calling those commenting on this entry right-wing within this definition. Right-wing is also a common shorthand (albeit sloppy) understandable to everyone in a very broad context. And this is what this blog is about - my attempt at clarity (note attempt!)

So much for your much-vaunted C.V.

Ah yes, my typo. Thank you for bringing this to my attention. On looking back I would have corrected this, but as it forms a pillar of this comment I think it might be considered censorship to do so. Personally, I don't mind typos when they occur in blogs. Blogs are often generated at great speed and are express in an informal register, much like an email to a friend. I've never made any claims for this blog to be a C.V. and my discerning eye is much more acute when working within working hours and on important projects.

Being a self-style 'paedant' is more about clarity and understanding than being 'correct' and rigid. It's like neo-pedantry, reclaiming that term to mean something slightly different. Having said that, I appreciate all corrections.

To summarize your skills: Bragging about your C.V., being able to use Google, and labeling people.

Ah, I think there's a language misunderstanding, here, assuming the comment author is American, which by the use of 'bragging' (not 'boasting') I believe them to be. I said my C.V. was 'pretty good' - classic British understatement. It's not outstanding or even distinctive by any means. As for 'well-qualified', this is true in terms of actual qualifications and grades and experience, also true. I don't think I've ever spoken about my actual 'talents', which would be boasting. I'll leave it to others to decide whether I have any at all...

Oh, and isn't it 'labelling'? Probably a typo.

To finish, I think I was most surprised at the hostile tone of that particular comment. To my intents and purpose I considered myself to be pretty neutral one way or another. Are there any mistakes I'm making? I'm largely ignorant on American political culture, but learning all the time thanks to those who take an interest.

Thank you to the other people who left comments. I'm delighted a global conversation is happening right here, folks on paedantry.com.

Bit puzzled about the comment telling me to 'ask my grandparents' - have the Welsh ever been on top?

Debbie, Debbie, Debbie

2007-01-24T14:46:00.000-08:00

The emails, texts and comments flowed in an unstoppable flurry all last night and today. The reaction to having Debbie Schlussel (from blog debbiedoespolitics.com) on WHYS has been quite astounding. Complaints, yes, from all over the world for giving her airtime (even a few threatening never to listen to the Beeb again) but many showing their support for the lady or congratulating us for representing different sides of a topic that riles people greatly.

I was thrilled to see she had blogged the experience and appreciated her extended airtime compared to the minutes callers usually receive due to the fast and furious nature of the show. The comments were very fierce and anti-Beeb, as one might expect, but I was interested to read from her description and the comments left by her fans that there was no distinction between those who listen to the BBC (the 'Beeb-ers' so called) and the BBC corporation itself.

I've only reletively recently come across the notion held by US right-wingers that the BBC is leftist and anti-American. This seems quite strange to one who's grown up with the BBC and as a teenager regarded it as rather old school, stuffy and conservative.

I was also pleased to see Debbie had quoted my last blog post, so the google spiders are finding me somehow. She even linked back to the paedentry blog, which is very good etiquette. However, I did see a naughty misquote where the start of a paragraph beginning ("I regret that...") was cut off so as to look as I regretted her treatment on air. Actually I was regretting that we spent so much time on the topic meaning that the Lebanon strike wasn't given the time it perhaps should have been.

Also, I must point out that I'm not an 'idiot producer' (one of her commentators, not the lady herself) at the BBC - at least not a producer yet (my idiot status I learned all by myself). I'm working at the BBC on a placement. And before everyone starts huffing about the BBC taking liberties with a work experience girl, I'm very well qualified with a pretty good C.V and lots of producing/researching experience, so there.

We had a Debbie montage and email roundup ready to go today, but unfortunately we had so many guests on Bush's State of the Union address and gay adoption that it was passed over. Although, we don't invite her on the show quite the once a week that was quoted in her blog, I am tempted to bring her in on a pro-Israeli as we always get a glut of people criticising the state.

It's interesting how people make assumptions. Americans complain about the rest of the world assuming they're arrogant or pugnacious. Right-wingers complain about the BBC being leftist. I wouldn't automatically describe myself one way or the other. I think the average right-winger would be surprised about some opinions I hold as I'm sure I might be wrong about many of the easy assumptions one might make about the so-called right.

*******

Update - after further research I learn that using Ms. Schlussel picture without her permission is not advised, so I've knocked up a photoshop interpretation.

Jostling for position

2007-01-23T11:14:00.000-08:00

Well done James, a disco is a discussion between the presenter and more than one person (usually with opposing views) - you can also have a 'trisco'.

More BBC jargon for the handbook...

Stringer - a blokey in a bureau that runs around taking sat phones to guests, meeting and greeting, getting vox pops etc.

Piggy back - to take advantage of a guest that's been on another programme before yours.

Sat in the studio for the first time during the programme and so missed my chance to be plugged on air for the blog as we had Dickey reading the comments today, the bloggers friends.

I booked our main guest today, Debbie Schlussel. The question was 'Does America's image matter?' - as in do Americans care what the world thinks of them? I knew Debbie would cause some controversy but I wasn't prepared for the angry, angry people down the phone, on the text, emails, comments on the blog. When you're fully interactive it does open multitudinous channels of abuse...

I felt a little guilty that Debbie didn't really have an ally and the callers were so vehemently against her (and cross with the BBC for giving her airtime). Occasionally it did feel like a public hanging. However, there was a late show of support from her in email form. I suppose your average right-winger doesn't really listen to the BBC. Also one caller called Des justified it best when he said that, although he completely disagreed with her, America's global image is often that of right-wingers like Debbie so it was relevant and even necessary to have her on.

I did regret that, because of the large response, we had to squeeze our other stories - the strike in Lebanon (with callers right in the midst of it) and the South African government's proposals to forcibly treat and confine TB sufferers. In fact, I liked these stories better and I consider them more worthy and more interesting. The U.S was a bit of a cheap shot and, of course, it descended into Bush bashing and Iraq rows briefly before Mad's swift presenting skills brought it back to the question in hand. That's the problem with user generated content, you have to strike a balance between what the listeners are pushing and what can take the show further.

Some excellent vox pops from Cairo and Nairobi opened the U.S question out - the BBC trumps everyone else time after time in being able to go to pretty much any country in the world at short notice. My favourite: (woman from Nairobi) "Americans, they good and bad...but most...bad".

Pig lingo

2007-01-22T13:07:00.000-08:00

More BBC jargon:

"Boarding" - doing interviews (I assume for employment, although the distinction was not made)

"Doughnut" - a voicer with an interview (this is pretty widely used outside the Beeb)

"Quality" - referring to an ISDN or satellite connection from a special phone or from a studio abroad that provides a much better audio standard than a normal phone line.

"Bureau" a studio abroad.

"Discussion programme" - NOT a talkshow, thanks.

"Disco" - not sure about this one yet but no dry ice or Wham! tracks are involved.

I'm going to write a mini-handbook for the next Westminster student, including directions to the canteen, how to use the beast that is ENPS, what they want from you when they say 'ps the texts to me and approve the blog comments', where not to sit and what exits NOT to use after 6pm leading to entrapment in a large glass room for half an hour and severe embarrassment. None of this is covered in the glossy health and safety bible they send you. Which I haven't opened.

However, I am getting better. I can even resist the temptation to correct spelling and grammar mistakes in texts to keep the 'local flavour'. I've plucked up the courage to ask to do some vox pops this week and I saw the studio for the first time today albeit only to guide a guest there. Plus I didn't get my suggestion biffed (rejected at the morning meeting) today. One of our callers proceeded to try and flirt with me by email. I was logged in as someone else so they read all his blunt overtures. Very embarrassing.

I didn't blog today as I asked to be in the studio but unfortunately was put on the phones at the last minute to soak up the flow of African callers. If it wasn't for the African man, the show would be very dull. You have a subject that you're sure is pretty straightforwardly answered (and therefore bad for a 'discussion programme') like female circumcision (bad) or homosexuality (acceptable) but then the phone lines start buzzing with Nigeria, Ghana, Sierra Leone, Guinea and it's all turned on its head with usually a 50-50 split between them for and against. Bless them.

Today we were talking about Hilary Clinton, can she make it as president. One caller from Nigeria said 'We do not need a woman president, the world has enough troubles already' - I thought this was great, he was so eloquent and well grounded - lit up the whole topic.

I'm excited to see Sorious Samura at the Frontline club on Thursday. He was a guest last week and damn good he was too. He is the director of the phenomenal Cry Freetown about the civil war in Sierra Leone.

Genocide, dead dads and birthday parties.

2007-01-19T11:16:00.000-08:00

Not sure how we pulled off tonight's show, but it worked somehow. The topics were - the repeal of the death penalty by the Rwandan government. This section of the show worked really well as we got the Justice minister in the Nairobi studio and had Rwandan callers (many of whom had lost their family in the genocide) ask him questions. The audience became the interviewer in the best example I have seen so far of this show being pretty revolutionary.

I have nothing but admiration for the way Ros can interrupt without offending and keep people to the point within the time we have. You wouldn't believe how quickly an hour can go by. We had a different editor today, her first day on the show. Because she was nervous I felt more confident to ask to see how audio was edited, how this and that worked. And I'm allowed to do some vox pops next week, which, admittedly are the kind of thing my peers were doing on their first day. I think people are getting used to me too. Rabiya, the most beautiful woman in radio, gave me some tips. Find what your good at and work like buggery at it.

However, I'm proud of my blogging the show from the first day - it's the main portal through which people get in touch and it's our public face. I finally got it right with yesterday's blog and I must admit to a little flush of pleasure when Ros praised me, he used my tagline on air as well. It's such a little thing, but I did spend the first three days feeling like I couldn't do anything right. Because of the pressure of deciding the topics, getting the guests and fielding calls and texts while on air everyone's pretty stoney faced and busy during the day. When they give you constructive criticism there's no sandwich.

The second subject was the case of a dead Israeli soldier who is going to become a father four years after he was killed. I think it's pretty weird, but Sheila a nurse in the US called it 'beautiful'. An Israeli guest explained how important it was in the Jewish faith to bear children.

Finally we discussed children's parties. Are they worth it? Anyone who's seen My Super Sweet Sixteen on MTV know the excesses parents go to to ensure their little darling gets the best party ever. I got my mate Zein on, but having obtained our main guest, Professor Bill Doherty from birthdayswithoutpressure.com (who was on Today this morning), he went missing from his office and was lost from radio heaven.

However innovative, WHYS still hasn't cured my deep seated hatred for the general public.

Race agenda

2007-01-18T08:23:00.000-08:00

We're talking about race tonight following the Shilpa Big Brother debate. It's something people love to talk about and this particular debate has received so much attention and, in my opinion, displayed the nastiest sides to Britain - I'm not talking about Jade, Jo and whoever, but how irrational people become when talking about race. Stupid people like the three white witches in BB are callous, narrow-minded, insensitive and, yes, racist. But the people with the view that only white people can be racist, or refuse to consider context really get on my wick.

It's also been blown completely out of proportion so this is the last I'll mention on it. I would like to tell a little of my own experience. I'm pretty hardy, you can call me a c**t and I probably wouldn't take it to heart. However, 'racist' is one of those insults that really hurts.

I was sitting in the pub joking around with my band and the boyfriend. As they normally do, lead singer was involved in banter with boyfriend about Africa. Her father is Nigerian, boyfriend is from Tanzania. She's black, he's white. They often have mock-arguments about west vs east Africa and were really getting into it. "West Africans are fat", he said. "East Africans are boring" she said. He said West Africans were corrupt, she asked what was so good about East Africans. I said 'they're such good runners'. "You're a racist", she said. I couldn't believe it. It didn't sting so badly because of the insult but that here was one of my very best friends and she obviously didn't know me at all.

Boyfriend wasn't called racist even though he often does comedy African accents, guitarist wasn't even though he and her often joke about black stereotypes but I was. I would have never had said anything remotely racial, let alone racist, before I met my lead singer. Guitarist like to joke about the 'dirty black pussy'. Lead singer jokes all the time about what white people do, their food, makes fun of Chinese people and mocks the Asian accent. There is a general banter in our band about race but I was slapped with the insult that can't be returned.

There's not much you can say when someone calls you racist. I was about to stress 'how many black friends I have' then thought how stupid that would sound. In fact, isn't that just typical white patronising behaviour? I was struck speechless by a mixture of indignation and white guilt.

In an empirical society so often context is lost. You are either racist or not racist - there's no 'joking' or 'banter'. Just two friends falling out about nothing.

WHYS blog

2007-01-17T04:03:00.000-08:00

Wednesday World Have Your Say blog is up - come on Westminster, get involved! Getting the hang of it now...so give me some love.

Second day screen blindness

2007-01-16T13:30:00.000-08:00

Staring at a computer screen all day, well, it's what modern research is all about. I wonder how many of us develop a hunch from crouching in front of the pixellated eye all day. Perhaps we'll evolve to a shape more fit to office chairs.

Second day and the gambling addiction suggestion I nicked from Doreen (who's visiting from The World Today) nearly, oh so nearly made it but was trounced by a debate on whether calling Shilpa from Celebrity Big Brother 'The Indian' was racist or not. The other topics were Is Africa portrayed fairly and accurately in films (a resounding no), opinions on Barack Obama and my job, which was to cold call a bunch of contacts all round the world to find out who they think should have a historic epic made of their life.

BLogging the show went a lot better than yesterday, having had some brief but adriot training from Ros and also having some help on the emails and comments. I'm still not sure how it all works but there seems to be a shift system happening with the whole floor. Half the people here today weren't here yesterday and everyone seems to do everything, in a number of different locations as the WHYS office is small and once editor Mark Sandell recovers from 'flu I made find myself parachuting in early to secure a desk.

A very lively show today thanks to some brilliant people working on it and getting some excellent guests. The World Service seems to operate on love not money. Two I particularly enjoyed (while blogging furiously) were Anant Singh and Sorious Samura talking about films about Africa. Films like Black Hawk Down, Hotel Rwanda and The Last King of Scotland have been criticised for showing only the worst side of Africa, while films like Out of Africa are colonial nostalgia and the less said about Coming To America the better. Thinking hard about it, and considering my connections there might be a documentary subject in there.

Finally I was pleased to hear that the Somali radio stations that had been banned were back on air. While governments can implement more security/privacy laws than ever before I really think that it's harder for people to be shut up due to the global conversation we are now able to have and this is all we have to combat it.

The whole story has been so heart rending and inevitable - another proxy battleground for Islamists and U.S. backed forces that I know I'm being naive when I dare to see a bright side. We get a lot of callers from Somalia and they're intensely proud and very considered on the whole.

2007-01-15T14:43:00.000-08:00

First day at WHYS and half the job was learning the lingo. A 'jive' is an article that invites listeners to get in touch, a 'postform' is like an email form for the same purpose, at the morning meeting if an idea doesn't make it, it's 'biffed'...

What I like most about the job is that I was instantly taken seriously. Both my ideas may have been 'biffed', but they were both seconded and backed by staff before their biffing and put on the website as possible suggestions. In fact, it's not necessarily the most hard hitting or up to the minute ideas that get taken on, but the ones that will provoke the most debate.

Three discussion topics made it into today's programme: whether giving to charities is effective; freedom of the press in Morocco and whether you have to be a parent to have the authority and understanding to send soldiers to war. I was working on the latter, which came following the comments Senator Barbara Boxer made to Condoleeza Rice.

I was researching and booking guests all day, nervous to disturb mostly men and women who had sons and daughters fighting in Iraq or had even lost them. My head was also spinning from working out the timezone difference, I woke one at least one poor Californian up. I scored a point in getting Nancy Lessin on the show, but was a bit dubious about my other caller Laura Knight-Jadczyk at first. After reading her blog about Rice (coincidently also called Signs Of The Times) I did some research on her and read some claims that she was the head of a cult that believes,

that inter-galactic reptilian shape shifters have invaded human 'organic portals' (otherwise known as psychopaths), in order to engineer 9/11. link

However, she was an great caller and spoke eloquently about the subject.

Twenty minutes before the show I learned I was to blog it live. Now, i'm good at multi-tasking but typing a live precis of the show, checking emails and texts and including them, HAND CODING the type AND periodically updating the SLOOOW loading blog proved a little difficult. The result was that, unfamiliar with their blog software and ENPS, I put up my long blog, with mistakes, on their front page and presenter Ros wasn't impressed. I was the last to leave the office.

So tired now, can't be bothered to tidy this blog up. Good night.

P.S. Ran into Shaima, she had started her day by interviewing one of the chief judges in the Saddam Hussein trial! Go girl!

Bad blogging and Berlin

2007-01-14T11:04:00.000-08:00

No blogging for nearly a week is not a good start for my WHYS work placement next week considering it's a show that places the newsgathering weight on blogging and comments on its website.

I spent the end of December and beginning of January in Berlin, not the first time I've been there (I've played four or five times in Berlin venues) but the first time I've not been working. Turn on the UK history channel and it's a pretty safe bet that there will be a programme about Nazi Germany or WW2 in general on. Times that factor by ten in Berlin. Everywhere you turn there's a Holacaust memorial, commemoration for the resistence members and hundreds of 'Hitler Walks', trails that take you all round sites of Nazi activity in Berlin inevitably culminating in a visit to the site of Hitler's bunker.

I stayed with some German friends, all between 18-25. As I had no phone and no internet I appreciated the cafe culture that still survives there, having been firmly exterminated in London by chain coffee shops. Many of them told me how sick they were of the 'inherited' guilt they felt they had for the Nazis. They said that most people thought that German's had to naturally be pro-Israel to make up for the Holocaust, although most of my friends have serious moral doubts about that country's policy towards Palestine.

We stayed in a beautiful flat (Berlin is extremely cheap to live) opposite a lovely art deco building that was being squatted by punks. The punks in Germany aren't like the typical British 'no future' punk of the 1970s. They are very political, non-racist, anti-fascist etc. However, they are often ill informed and obnoxious in their views according to my friends. They refuse to pay any rent on account of it being kowtowing to the system yet work jobs and have laptops and plasma screen televisions. A notable run in we had with them was at a local gig. One punk girl was telling me how she was an Oi! and that meant she was anti-nazi, pro-israel, anti-racist etc and how society could 'get fucked' etc etc. All her compatriots were highly annoying, moshing and bumping into us and all wore graffited clothes proclaiming their Oi 'membership'. Speaking to my friend I voiced how they must not be aware that the original Oi movement in London was made up of largely violent white racists. Apparently he later passed this onto the girl and she accused him of calling him a fascist and hit him over the head with a beer bottle. Charming.

While I firmly believe that Germany should learn from their infamous past, I still feel it's a shame that later generations are yoked with this taboo on saying anything about Israel, about certain races or anything that could be construed as nationalist, especially. Recently a pop song about love was banned because the lyrics used the colours of the German flag as a metaphor for love. For example 'Red, the colour of my heart', 'yellow, the colour of your hair' etc. These aren't the actual lyrics, which I will try and find out. Oh and did you know that German law forbids all songs containing the words: honour, hero and fame?

Germany will never be able to get over its past (and I mean 'get over' not forget), not least because so much of its tourist economy is bound up in macabre tourism as well as the millions of those who want to learn from this period in history. Jewish Berliners are even making Nazi comedies now with 'Mein Fuehrer - the Truly Truest Truth about Adolf Hitler' causing no end of hubbub.

I wonder where I get my pedantic tendancies?...

2006-12-10T18:46:00.000-08:00

My mother is in the habit of leaving little clippings of interest on my place at the breakfast table. This is a clipping from the Independent and contains at least two errors as well as being completely graceless even in print.

Assessed radio packages are due in in a matter of hours. When I went to record mine, I took along a camera and an extra cameraman to put in some Smoke News practice. I have produced both a short film and a two minute news clip from that session. They have been ready for a while but being a firm disciple of Chris Horrie in law matters, I have spent the last three weeks collecting in the last few consent forms.

It's not just the fact that they scream, poo and don't do what they're told that leads to that well-known saying "never work with children and animals" but the heap of paperwork you have to fill in before broadcast.

For my film I made sure all sixteen and overs signed consent forms and all under sixteens had forms signed by parents. In the club, the BBC's Culture Show (who got there before me by five minutes) had put up signs and distributed information prior to the event saying that by attending the club you agreed to be in GVs. I also put up my less than impressive signs.

To cover myself even further I had to cut out some of the best bits as some of the kids seemed to be drinking underage. None of that appears either. If there is anything else anybody sees that might be defamatory, let me know - it's important I get it right. Here's the link to the short film

Here's the two minute news package with my naff voiceover:

I received a call from a French production company on Friday asking to use some of my footage from the Underage Club. Eager to please, and flattered I sent it off at once. Speaking to my boyfriend (and second cameraman) later I told him the exciting news:

"Did you ask for any money?"
"Well, no - I'm just an amateur, and I suppose they're just a small company"
"What were they called"
"Canal something..."
"Canal Plus?"
"Yes! That's it."
"Idiot".

Doh.

Happy now?

2006-12-04T07:57:00.000-08:00

I confess, when I chose white on acid green I was being discriminatory against the over 25s. It is a little known fact that the under 25s and particurlarly teenagers are able to see and hear a wider range of light and sound frequencies. This has been recently exploited in a ringtone that uses a high frequency only teenagers and children can hear what with their unabused, virginal earholes.

The tone is also being marketed to shopkeepers to disperse loitering hoodies who gather outside, scaring off Daily Mail readers. Link

The visual element is more tricky to use, but experiments are underway to find colour schemes to use in advertising that only young people can see.

I hope I have now fixed the problem regarding my blog with good old black on white and no age discrimination legislation will be brought against me.

Bureaucracy, information and mole man

2006-11-30T16:51:00.000-08:00

Firstly, a big thank you to Rachael for blogging the Lance Price talk.

In her spirit of sharing - here is the best I can do for now, a podcast of Group C's Nov 27th broadcast. Quality isn't great so use it for reference and I'll try to improve it when I get the facilities at uni.

I've had a frustrating day of bureaucracy. Having misplaced my oyster card I spent half an hour on the 'phone to TFL's wrist-slittingly monotoneous automatated service. When someone finally answered and I told him I had misplaced my student card he asked my name, cancelled my card before asking my permission, then told me it would take a month for a new card and a refund to come through - during which time I will have to spend £80 in adult fares. "But what if I find it?", I spluttered, "oh, it's too late now, I've done it" he answered.

Then an outraged friend gives me a call. He bought a Toyota Prius six months ago, a hybrid car, partly because of its low emissions and fuel economy but mostly because hybrid cars are exempt from the congestion charge. He had been happily swanning about in it for almost half a year before he was hit with hundreds of pounds of congestion charges. Why? Because he hadn't registered it. Even though the make of the car comes up with the licence plate you have to register to be exempt, which, of course, nobody had told him. Oh, and the registration costs £10. £10 a year to not pay anything.

Fed up to the back teeth with bureaucracy, I decided to create some of my own and make a freedome of information request pertaining to a subject I've been interested in for some time. There is a derelict house at the end of Other Half's Road just off Kingsland Road, Hackney. The large detached Victorian house has been cordoned off for some time, but was inhabited until very recently by William Lyttle, known locally as 'Mole Man'.

Mr. Lyttle owns the property but has been a cause of concern to his neighbours because of his unusual hobby. Since the 1960s he has been digging a network of tunnels underneath the building, which a Guardian article written earlier this year reckon to be "some 8m (26ft) deep, spreading up to 20m in every direction from his house".

Cracks had started appearing in the road outside the house, especially worrying as the road is on the route of the 76 bus - of the large double decker variety. In 2001, the road outside the house collapsed leaving a large hole. And his excavations have also caused power loss in the area after he hit a 450 volt cable.

The council evicted him in August this year but just before then Other Half had the pleasure of an encounter with him. By this time the house was falling apart and had little if no roof on top. Mr. Lyttle had turned down the council's offer of bed and breakfast and was waiting for them to forceably (temporarily) evict him.

Other Half, being of an inquisitive nature, was looking at the property, which had fences and tape around it prior to the eviction. He was on the opposite side of the road when he spotted a local chav trying his luck and climbing the fence. Chav got as far as the main steps when Mole Man stuck his furious head out of the window, shouted 'Fuck off!' and broke a bottle over chav's head! O.H ran to lend assistance but the startled intruder ran off. Mole Man then turned and threatened O.H. "and I'll give you one too, you bastard!".

Mr. Lyttle hasn't always been so hot-headed. Not only did he give an interview to the Guardian, telling them,
"I first tried to dig a wine cellar, and then the cellar doubled, and so on. But the idea that I dug tunnels under other people's houses is rubbish. I just have a big basement. It's gone down deep enough to hit the water table - that's the lowest you can go."
But also appeared in a DIY disasters programme showing the crew round his tunnels, some big enough to stand up in,
“This is going to be the leisure centre,” he said, sweeping his hand round a large cavern. “And this in here will be the sauna.”

Anyhow, I want to know what the council are doing to this property, what it's costing, is there any danger to the public, and where have they put William Lyttle, its rightful owner? Here's my letter - my first attempt so if anyone fancies themselves a legal expect please make any suggestions:

Bambos Charalambous
Policy Law Team,
London Borough of Hackney
Town Hall
Mare Street
London E8 1EA

1st December 2006

Dear Bambos Charalambous,

I am writing to make an open government request for all the information to which I am entitled under the Environmental Information Regulations. In order to assist you with this request, I am outlining my query as specifically as possible. As you will understand, this may not be a definitive list of relevant information.

I wish to see the relevant paperwork concerning the property of 121 Mortimer Road, N1. I know that the owner of the house has excavated a network of tunnels underneath the property and I would like to see surveyor’s reports of the possible damage to the area and the risk assessment to the public. I would like to know the cost of the repair work going on and the projected timespan. I would also like to see correspondence from local people, which I understand has been going on for the last forty years, complaining about William Lyttle’s tunnelling and any minutes from meetings pertaining to this case.

I believe this case to be in the public interest.

I would also like to know if and when Mr. Lyttle will move back to his house and where he has been placed in the meantime.

I would be interested in any information within your organisation regarding my request. I understand that I do not have to specify particular files or documents and that it is the department's responsibility to provide the information I require.

I understand that under the Regulations, I should be entitled to a response within two months. I would be grateful if you could confirm in writing that you have received this request. I look forward to hearing from you in the near future. I have also emailed you this request.

Yours,

Ruth Owen

Indonesia

2006-11-29T08:00:00.000-08:00

As my other half is in Indonesia this week I thought I might do some research about the country. It's primarily known here for being Muslim, having a high proportion of the world's cases of avian 'flu and for being the starting point for the deep sea earthquake that triggered the 2004 tsunami killing more than 131,000 in Indonesia alone in 2004

It's the fourth most populous nation in the world and, as is the sad case in many developing nations, is blighted with a yearly rise in new cases of HIV. According to official reports there are a quarter of a million cases of HIV recorded, but it is estimated that the real figure is more like half a million. The country suffers in this respect from a cultural Asian unwillingness to talk about sex and also from its strong Muslim culture (which parallels many Christian African nations reluctance to confront the issue).

Other half reports that he has never seen so many prostitutes working in the cities, in the hotels and on the roadside - and he grew up in various sub-Saharan impoverished countries so he's not green by any means. However, with this liberal attitude to the sex trade comes a sadly typical hypcritical religious line - Muslim clerics are generally opposed to the use of condoms and surveys reveal that only 15% of sex workers use them. There is also widespread intravenous drug use which is contributing to the spread of the disease.

Over the last year the government has pledge to set up AIDS awareness campaigns and centres for HIV infected individuals. Since the Tsunami, Indonesia has been more visible to the world so perhaps this is why the change has come.

Indonesia has some of the world's most diverse flora and fauna. Some of you may have seen its colourful reefs on the BBC's Planet Earth. It has some of the most lush rainforest which is, surprise surprise, being cut down each year by illegal loggers. Other half is shooting a doc for the BBC about software that can track illegally logged wood and lead to the culprits. He missed Bush's visit by a day, unfortunately. George was there for a caring, sharing photo-op but also to get his arm in as Indonesia has just signed energy contracts with both Japan and Russia. The U.S. are scared stiff it might become a China super-state beyond their control - and it's a Muslim one too!

The visit was widely protested against both by Indonesians and by U.S human rights groups who want Bush to withhold sales of weapons the Indonesian military in light of serious human rights abuses. Weapons sales to the Indonesian military (who exist pretty much independently from the government) had been legislated against until 2005 when the final blocks were waived.

As Indonesia is one of the few countries left the U.S. can sell arms to without then going to war against them or being condemned worldwide, I don't think those ties are going to be broken anytime soon.

Link

Nice little slideshow of Indonesian reef action

Blogger on the beat

2006-11-27T15:40:00.000-08:00

The Independent did a special today on blogging policemen. I was surprised at the eloquence of many of the blogs, perhaps indicating that a more intelligent type of person is naturally more at ease with technology. However, I believe my surprise reveals a contradictory stereotype I, and possibly many others, have of English policemen.

On the one hand I still cling to the comforting image of our local PC (Jerry Blood was his name) as a kid who came to our school to warn us of 'stranger danger'. He was a friendly, firm figure who I was always trained to seek out in loco parentis. A kind of stern servant.

On the other backhand, there exists in my mind the figure of the racist, sexist, thuggish (and probably quite thick) policeman portrayed often in fiction and more frequently in real life undercover type programmes. These images seem to co-exist in my mind and make me feel shifty whenever a bobby passes by from a combined feeling of fear and guilt.

What is certain is that the police force was never something I aspired to and I always rather viewed it with distrust and a bit of contempt. After all, they're not firemen, are they?

Only one policeman in the Independent's selection wrote with disturbing pleasure about dealing out a nasty blow to a rioter and one felt they had really had to search to provide a contrast to a range of, on the whole, very interesting, sensible and often funny writers. Most of them wrote of the frustrations of dealing with the general public, timewasters, abusive drunks, unrealistic nostalgia addicts (like me) who think more policemen on the street means less crime (the writer pointed out that all criminals needed to do was wait til they passed).

One writer wondered where Iain Blair had got to after being so visible in past months, while another debunked the myths of TV fiction and revealed that he pretty much acted as investigative team, clerk and public liasion in one.

Apparently the Met are very nervous about these bloggers and have pretty much banned officers, at least, from blogging. But the window into someone's life provided by a blog is worth a hundred times more than any outreach 'Community Officer' programme. Although I still have no burning desire tbo become a policewoman, it's from a greater appreciation of the difficulty of the job. Oh and the racism, sexism, brutality.... ;)

Finally before my battery runs out, our lovely government is trying to push through quick legislation curtailing the Freedom of Information act. Organisations will be able to refuse to issue you with information on the grounds of it being 'too expensive'. This breaks their very own pledge not to do this. I urge everyone to go to The Campaign for Freedom of Information and have a look. The Guardian's site is also very good. Perhaps we can make a petition?

Adsects

2006-11-22T05:07:00.000-08:00

I woke up this morning whispering to myself a slogan from a well known advert that I see everyday on the train. Picking up what I thought to be an Independent, I saw it was the Metro clothed in sheep's clothing - a full cover advert by Microsoft mimicing the vast white spaces of google, or the new Arena poster inspired Independent front pages. Intruding into my web browser, my evening walk, my life, adverts and the semiological nonsense they implant in my brain. Did I come up with that line myself? Do I really hold that opinion?

Some bastards in Buffalo of all places have now developed a method of lasering in a logo onto the wings of a butterfly. The laser activates genetically altered cells in the insect which flouresce when heated. How could we improve on the beauty of a butterfly? Well, we could imprint a microsoft logo on it apparently.

I imagined the scene: late one evening in the future I leave a window open while one (energy saving) lightbulb keeps sentinel; a genetically altered moth, now a harbinger of sell crashes into my haven, bounces off the lightbulb and into my face. In a blind and stupid panic I skitter across the floor rubbing in horror at my face. In the days of post traumatic stress to come the image of flapping wings intertwined with my blinking eyelashes, except there's something else, like a high speed flick book the wings are branded with a face, a clown's face under two golden arches.

I wouldn't be surprised if British farmers of the future decided to supplement their meagre income by investing in genetically altered flouresocows, which glow with the Starbucks logo as commuter trains pass them. Or rather morbidly they could brandish speech bubbles sponsored by British Beef - "I'm what's going into your hamburger".

It's a semiologist's nightmare, especially as animals have no prior consent - making them an advertisers dream. Body advertising isn't a new concept. Some chap last year offered his forehead as advertising space on ebay and was paid £16500 for a temporary tattoo on his brow. Animals have no consent or fee issues which makes them perfect for unwitting advertising.

Cocan't

2006-11-20T15:43:00.000-08:00

Oh My News, The Independent , The New Zealand Herald and, yes, my favourite The London Paper all carry stories today about London being the cocaine capital of Europe.

According to a report by The European Monitoring Centre on Drugs and Drug Addiction (a mouthful for even the most sober among us), 6.8% of Londoners did cocaine between 2001-2003 compared to 4.8% in Spain, the next biggest nose hoovers. Apparently, young people between 16-25 are the biggest growing group to take the drug due to lowering prices and celebrity 'endorsement' from walking coat hangers Pete Doherty and Kate Moss. Well, what a surprise. Young people you say, doing drugs? And famous people? In London of all places? Smells like lazy journalism to me.

Every year there's some expose on drug taking in London, usually cocaine and what are the results? It's a drugs used by famous people and the media and makes you talk a lot. Well done.

In 2003, the BBC proclaimed London the 'crack capital' of England. The Evening Standard, meanwhile, loves to do undercover swab tests; revealing the use of cocaine at top London clubs like China White (named after a type of heroin) and London Fashion Week in 2005 (shock horror!) and then there's the constant fascination with Kate Moss doing the drug with this gem from the Mirror catching my eye:

As the white powder induces a sudden rush to her brain, she rocks back in her seat and laughs hysterically. The coke is kicking in.

Genius.

What do these exposes achieve? They certainly don't change people's behaviour towards cocaine as shown by the report and I don't think any celebrities are going to stop taking coke. How many times has Pete Doherty been up for drugs possession? It must be getting on for ten now. He's only been jailed once, and that was for burglary.

These pieces tell us nothing more about the drug. You'd have to be deaf and blind not to know that cocaine is taken by media types and makes you a bit chatty.

I went to the Notting Hill Arts Club tonight, once a favourite hang out of the Moss/Frost gang and spoke to Dom the front of house manager. He told me that all that comes from these types of pieces is a headache for him. Accompanying the Evening Standard's swab scandal article was a large picture of his club - not China White or Panageaa or any poncey West End clubs who might sue.

Thanks to that, the day after it was published the club was visited by the Drugs Prevention Agency and forced to rebuild the toilets so there were no flat surfaces and install (and pay) staff in the boys and girls to make sure there was no drug taking. The bar prices went up as a result.

The Arts Club is a small, cosy club, which doesn't make a lot of money. It's no China White and I'm very grateful for this. It puts on good bands, allows local artists to exhibit for free and doesn't charge on the door before 8pm.

Dom freely acknowledged that he can't stop people taking cocaine if they're determined to. Any idiot knows a lack of flat surface is not going to stop a hungry nose. He and his staff do their utmost to prevent drug taking and it's not fair to punish a small community club on the evidence of a few swabs. The worse thing about it, he said, is that the hypocrites at the Associated Press (Evening Standard's parent company) drink in a bar down Kensington Church Street, which is known for being rife with the stuff. Perhaps someone should turn the tables on the journalists and do a swab test in their bar.

It's a classic case of making a story out of nothing, almost wagging the dog. The classic user of cocaine isn't your street gangster or model, it's a sub editor up late trying to put together the morning issue.

And in other irritating news: Guardian comment writers have issued a
manifesto listing points right and fair comment writers should follow. Surely the point of comment is that it's your own opinion, as rude and partisan as you feel fits the piece. In fact, politicising the issue of race and religion ("we need to have a national conversation about race") makes an issue where there need not be. The whole thing smacks of self-righteousness.

2006-11-13T16:39:00.000-08:00

Corruption in my manor today. The Prison Service has released a report uncovering a 'regime of torture' at Wormwood Scrubs prison. The twin stubs of the scrubs are a familiar sight when I worked at Wormwood Scrubs riding school as a child. Its an imposing building but no-one ever seems to know it's there, unlike Holloway or Pentonville which are both signposted. The Scrubs has existed in its own world, looking like a nineteenth century timewarp.

The wardens seem to have taken advantage of its invisibility by familiarity by blantantly faking reports on prisoner assault. The officer on watch was signed off as 'Officer Invisibile' or 'Officer Nobody'. I'm sure nobody's particularly surprised at this kind of mistreatment of prisoners. In fact, I reckon the majority of the population are quite approving. On Newsnight tonight they reported on a prisoner who sued successfully for assuault as he had been denied methadone treatment. Although I'm not in favour of convicted criminals revenging themselves on the justice system in this way the English prison system always frustrates me in its attitude of "lock 'em all up, that'll sort them".

Recently Dhiren Barot the good looking terrorist was sentenced to 40 years. 40 years for something he hasn't even done?! In this country tax evasion will in some circumstances reap you a longer sentence than murder. I can't see how locking someone up for fraud makes any sort of sense. Surely if they've been convicted, they won't ever be in a position of power to commit the same offence as long as they're sanctioned appropriately. In cases of violent crime, denying someone their liberty is justified for the protection of the public but in many other cases I can't see how cramming in a bunch of criminals with each other and subjecting them to humiliation and extreme boredom is supposed to create reformed characters.

In other news, I am writing an article for the Smoke on the new Ministry of Sound prepaid maestro card. For someone who presumeably can't manage their own finances to the extent that they need a pre-pay card, the card comes with a mass of confusing transaction fees to furrow anyone's brow. Pre-pay cards have been in the news earlier this year as the Bliss and Extreme cards targeted the pre-teen market. There were mixed reactions ranging from approval of teaching children to manage budgets to concerns that it will accustom kids to spending money that's not theirs.

Cards like the Splash Card are also popular with people with bad credit ratings. The MOS card, however, is firmly aimed at students with rewards from itunes and use of its 'famous' VIP room.

The sell is that you top up the card with money as you would a phone and use it as a debit card. However it's not connected to your bank account so you avoid going into debt. How this is different from a Solo or an Electron card I can't see - Apart from it being much more expensive. The fees are £1 for any top up, £1.50 for an ATM withdrawal, 20p for any transaction, £5 for a replacement card and £9.99 for the card itself. So if you only top the card up with £10 (the limit is £500 a day capping at £3500, but what student has that sort of money?)

As objective as I will be in the article, I reserve the right to comment in my blog. £1 a top up?! Big rip off, and unless there's a particular reason you don't want the card to be connected to your bank account (like you're an alledged illegal DVD vendor) I can't see how this card has an advantage over Solo or Electron, which cost nothing to use and use electronic checks before being accepted to stop you going into overdraft.

2006-11-08T16:21:00.000-08:00

WHERE ARE YOU ALL?

I sat through and enjoyed the "Journalism Networking Event!" (why the exclamation mark?) at Harrow Campus today, although it was vastly under attended. At one point the panel looked set to outnumber the audience. Where were the undergraduates? The PG Dips were well represented, although the print marginally more than broadcast.

The presentations were of particular interest to me as I think I've got the theory bit worked out as far as we've been taught so far and I've informed my own learning. The practical side I'm very comfortable with as machines, computers and the like are my friends. I also have the show off trait that allows me to approach strangers for interviews and stand up and talk off the cuff without too much embarrassment. However, the whole getting a job bit has been pretty hazy in my mind as far as how I would actually 'get in' to wherever it is I want to go.

Dean Sally Feldman looked slightly annoyed there wasn't a better turn out but gave a rousing opening speech nonetheless concerning her career and touching on one programme (that she co-edited) of which I'm very fond: Woman's Hour, although I'm sure I was the only student in the room who has actually heard it and the staff probably share the Andy Kershaw opinion of the long running gyno-slot (keep reading until page 3 or 4).

She told us of the 'Love' magazines she edited, which were teen magazines of the photo-story and problem page variety. All 'true life' (not 'real life'?). She described how she had to teach the subs how to write in explicit detail about sex: lots of unjournalistic metaphor. There were fire metaphors 'he touched me and I blazed in desire' or water metaphors 'he melted into me liquid to liquid', but never at the same time, presumably they would put each other out.

The speaker who interested me most as far as she represents a path possibly similar to the one I shall tread was also the first. Becky Hogge worked originally as a dance music journalist before discovering a love for the internet and joining opendemocracy.net as a code monkey before working her way up to write a column. As she shares my two interests, music and tech stuff I attempted to pounce on her at the nibbles after but she escaped. However, she can expect an email from one 'in-house geek' to another.

Next was
Amar Singh, a ex-pupil of Westminster and of Mike Dodd's also. He had really served his time, working as a runner, for an asian website which then went bust, for India Weekly (a paper with one thousand subscribers only), then made a jump to be the editor of Asian Express, Eastern Eye and then took a demotion of sorts to become a reporter on the Evening Standard. His career path to me seemed a case of shining talent but no luck, something that worries me immensely. He played to his strengths, which was that he had a muslim perspective during 2001 and got his break.

Next was Gina Antchandie who works for the Arts Council spending a vast budget in encouraging ethnic minorities into publishing. As Jim Latham later said, around 90% of people in media are white and middle class. I had felt a little stung last month when my application to Radio 4's factual department bursary was rejected, while those of my peers were accepted, although they weren't familiar at all with Radio 4's output. However, I don't think being white and middle class is a disadvantage quite yet, you just gots to have the moolah.

Maxim Ford, Polish film graduate who ended up making documentaries for Channel 4, confirmed yet again that it was his unique perspective that got him the job, not particularly his talent, although that is pretty damn immense. I have a few very close Croatian friends and its possible/probably entry into the EU in 2010 rang little 'story' bells in my head as he was bemoaning the lack of interest in Eastern Europe at this time. What was clear, though, was that Mr Ford had had to toe the Channel 4 line, sacrificing what he really wanted to do, which was make films.

Siobhan Curhamdid one of those 'become a freelance journalist' postal courses one finds in the newspaper classifieds during her pregnancy and was rewarded with a 'distinction' (i.e. she paid them) and a naff laminated 'press pass'. She managed to get a piece accepted for 'That's Life' (close cousin of Take A Break), then wrote a book, then another and is now a columnist and presenter. Pretty impressive in her field but it made me wonder how she supported herself.

Chris Parkinson was our panel's most radical speaker, voting to throw all C.Vs in the bin and an staunch believer in merit over qualifications. In fact I think it was only respect for the fact that he was speaking at a university that he didn't denounced degrees and students altogether and recommended us to the 'university of life'. He was an excellent speaker, however, and reminded us that it's contacts, dear boy, that will get you through the door. A very popular speaker, although I'm sure his company, London at Large (significantly offline until the new year), which provides information on the whereabouts of London celebrities for a sky high fee isn't regarded so highly.

Finally Jim Latham, our hero, secretary of the BJTC,who for all intents and purposes ARE the broadcasting industry. He had a mini-spaterooni with Chris Parkinson, standing up for the curriculum vitae as standard in broadcasting at least. His line was that most of the speakers he sees at these kind of events recommend students to make it how they did, that is without training or qualifications. However, times have changed and, in broadcasting at least, it is imperative to have a BJTC accredited qualification, only because a company might get fine if an employee messes up and is proved not to be properly trained. Those who say a course in journalism in useless (and many people have said the same to me) don't understand how it's all changed (he says) and are largely the same people who scoff at podcasts and blogging.

During his speech and in an informal chat to the broadcasters afterwards he spoke frankly and clearly and made it clear he was on our side. Make an impression at your placement, he told us, but don't be exploited. He cited the example of a girl (nameless) who featured in a Guardian media expose of the exploitation of work experiencers in the broadcast industry. She worked as a runner for a BBC drama and, as part of her duties, was asked to source a house for the house party which would tolerate hard drugs being sold. Of course, if the police had turned up all fingers would have pointed to her.

The biggest issue in media at the moment, he said, was diversity. It is key that the media embrace a wider range of class and ethnicity if only for the fact that very often journalists don't have enough background to write an article.

It seems to me that although the goalposts have shifted slightly in the fact employers look for a qualification on the whole, the basic prerequisite for obtaining a job remains the same: no-one's going to do it for you, create a unique selling point and get out there and do it. The only change is the tools we use to do this.

On a tasty last note Jim pointed out that if you google BJTC, the fourth result is a certain piece of street slang. I am happy to reveal that according to urban dictionary it stands for Blow Job To Completion. Wouldn't expect anything less from the council than a job done properly.

Oh, and for those who've accused me of lapsing regarding pedantry:

2006-11-07T11:25:00.000-08:00

What was the phrase I was searching for yesterday? It was USER GENERATED CONTENT. Slap on the front of Media Guardian an article on drives by The Sun and Channel 5 to invite viewers/readers to send in their pictures and movies and whatnot. Channel 5 are offering £100 pounds for short videos or photos that may be used in bulletins. They're calling it 'Your News' while Newsnight picks up/rips off Korean citizen journalist site Oh My Newsto bring us Oh My Newsnight

This being the BBC, there's no pecuniary reward, just a warning not to do anything hazardous. Thinking about Paxman's reaction to the introduction of a weather forecast at the end of the programme, god knows what he's going to think of broadcasting amateur footage. In fact, there's a sly dig at anyone who might think of sending in their two minute documentaries (using YouTube) as the winners will be played out during Newsnight's 'Geek Week' in January. Actually, I take the term 'geek' as a compliment, so there.

I know I go on about moblog (I'm not working for them, honest) but in the last week Greenpeace have been blogging their successful mission to shut down Didcott power station as they occupied (and chained themselves to) the site. There's also great footage of last weekend's Climate Change rally on their moblog. As Alfie says

Greenpeace's use of moblogs to deliver information from within their protests is in my opinion a truly deep and excellent use of mobile blogging technology

As I said in my moblog report for Smoke News, it's not just whether you blog, it's whether you get there first...which I haven't obviously seeing as I'm blogging about things that happened yesterday or further back in time. Ahem.

Had fun editing this piece to music last night - camera work by James Leckie. Some lovely footage of men in nappies as the Westminster Rugby team 'haze' the freshers.

2006-11-05T14:34:00.000-08:00

After that short and unblogworthy rant last Tuesday I have thought further about what in particular annoys me about The London Paper. I think first it's the patronising colour coding of different sections, which I notice its older sister the Evening Standard has also adopted. Pink for the fashion sections, blue for business, red for sport and a violent puce (the vomit inducing effect I mentioned earlier) for the letters and comments page.

Then the layout reminds me of many websites circa 2002: image and text heavy, wholly unfriendly on the eye in that the eye cannot rest on anything for long but flicks about from piece to piece. It resembles a scrapbook or a kids webpage - in fact it reminds me very much of Neopets. Every review is a 'blog', supposedly submitted to the website and they have a guest column where readers are invited to text in their votes as to whether this particular author should be able to write again for the paper - aka 'more or bore'. Everywhere you find '@' signs and web speak. Why?

An informal chat with David D-G and his chums during lunch on Thursday brought to my attention the front page of the FT. One of the headlines was that Google stand to make more advertising revenue this year than ITV. When I looked at TLP again it started to make sense. The paper is all about the web, or rather it's all about money. It comes from the (largely incorrect, though not always) premise that a website is a way of making money out of nothing. People read it because it's free - advertisers make money because people read it. I looked at TLP again - just like Google there were advertisements tailored for the paper - one for the Borat movie said 'you get paper for free so you have money to see my movie-film'. Everywhere there is user generated content because a) it's free and b) it lends 'credibility' to the writing along the lines that 'real people' are writing it. I have been looking forward to a web 2.0 paper ever since the technology was released for a downloadable, reuseable paper, but I sure as hell hope it doesn't look like this.

Editing Mama Shamone's trip up to Manchester for In The City all weekend but there's nothing to show yet as I'm still getting to grips with editing to music but I should have a promo to show by the end of the week. I really believe that the music industry is one of the last bastions of casual and unintentional racism/sexism. My band is quite blatently a punk rock band but when we arrived we found we were playing the urban stage with a bunch of RnB, electro and soul funk acts. We're about as urban as a haystack.

Meanwhile here is an interview I did off the cuff for a radio lesson, which made me laugh. Charged with getting an interview with background noise, I had failed until late Sunday night on the 149 bus I spotted a group of Horay Henrys completely out of their usual paradigm in Hackney. Tipsy but not loutish, they noticeably didn't touch in to the oyster reader. Armed with a microphone and a classist confidence they wouldn't attack me with such R.P tones I accosted one for an interview (click the yahoo button below):

2006-10-31T13:16:00.000-08:00

Spent the weekend in Manchester shooting a rockumentary of sorts and was impressed with the free paper the Manchester Evening News. It made me cringe when I returned to London and sampled The London Paper. I suppose what they're trying to do is make a Web 2.0 paper but from the layout to the mid air suspended reader comments the paper is a vomit inducing waste of trees.

2006-10-23T15:43:00.000-07:00

Spent the weekend playing with my band and pushing a little further in Final Cut Pro. I was cutting a small 'And Finally' feature about a kid who was doing work experience in our university. I put my foot in it when I asked what year in primary school he was in. He was fifteen.

I'm finding that I'm rather good in bringing people out and coaxing them into talking to the camera. There is a general distrust with anyone wielding a microphone and especially a camera, but I find a little flattery and put on naivete works wonders. Asian boys and girls tend to be the least willing, which could be an interesting survey.

2006-10-19T06:20:00.000-07:00

First of all, here is the interview with Alfie I promised. It's the full shebang, which I edited down considerably for the University of Westminster Smoke Screen TV news package. It's also minus my first piece to camera, which is probably a blessing. It's five minutes, which is too long for a news programme, but I've chosen to put it up in full because this gentleman says some very interesting stuff about 'citizen journalism' and the commercialisation of their output.

Moblog have entered in to a partnership with Scoopt recently, enabling mobloggers to potentially earn money. Some moblog users seem to think this goes against the spirit of moblog, some are worried about credibility issues, and some about whether they'll lose the right to their photos altogether.
Discussion here

Take this with last night's ITV news piece on advertisers using YouTube to pedal their wares... can you hear the ker-ching of change a coming?

Secondly, here's the intro for the news package, pictures by our director Eren Ozkural and music by me with the help of my band Mama Shamone

This week on Smoke Screen News we have stories coming in on Ruth Kelly's request to lecturers to 'spy' on students for signs of extremism, vox pops on the new smoking bans in many campuses and an overview of the recycling facilities (or lack thereof) around Harrow campus.

I'm also trying to interview some of the Chinese students on the International Journalism course about how they feel now that N.Korea's gone nuclear and plans more tests. Are they afraid for their families? Do they feel solidarity with North Koreans? I've emailed a couple of MAJI students but please get in touch if you're willing to do a quick inteview, even if its just about your experiences in London. I'm aware that the media works *quite differently* in China so you don't have to talk about Korea if you feel it's unwise.

And on a lighter note, I'm interviewing the canteen's youngest worker tomorrow. He's 12, on work experience and the most polite and professional caterering staff member I've ever seen.

This week I was supposed to take a break (of sorts) and just edit everyone's footage together. However, as stories don't choose a time to break, I've found myself grabbing a camera and being ready to go in a matter of seconds, fingers grappling with the white balance as I jog along. I've also been taught three point lighting, which, although I'm very happy to know it, I can't imagine every using it. Far too harsh, I was up adjusting the lights to what please me. There are no hard and fast rules, just an intuitive sense of what doesn't look shit.

On a note of clarity, only one news package in and I'm developing a hatred of pieces to camera and 'noddies', where the camera cuts to separate footage of the interviewer pretending to respond to the interviewee with Diana-esque head bobbings. I like my news journalist-free as much as possible. I'd much rather have voiceovers if necessary than my ugly fizzog mugging to camera. It makes for much more straightforward news.

Oh, and we've got a very hot story coming in, which might get us into a lot of trouble, if not close us down altogether. My fingers are burning to blog about it, but we'll see how it goes.

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I took part in the History Matters mass blog on Tuesday. Feeling rather silly as I did it, I blogged every little detail from what I wore and had for breakfast to the state of the Silverlink and the gradient of faces from black to white as I travelled from East to West London. Apparently the combined mecha-blog will be stored digitally in the British library - on what format? Will future generations be able to read it at all? Are we creating a sort of digital Rosetta stone? That and the fact the site crashed three or four times while many people were blogging put a few of my closest off the idea of participating.

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Finally some signs.

Official, punk is dead.

And it's another useless apostrophe, I'm afraid. But if I don't keep putting them up, how will people EVER LEARN?!

2006-10-16T13:41:00.000-07:00

It was prescient of me to mention Orwell. Chris Horrie, the Eddie Izzard of lecturers, gave a superb lecture on Orwell's Politics and the English Language on Friday.

I had read the essay before but in an English degree context. Now, wanting to hone my journalism (as oppose to my writing) I listened with an entirely different head on. Weeding out the bollocks was the basic theme of the lecture, which fits in very nicely with the theme of this blog.

Redundant adjectives, jargon, pat phrases clutter up the literature that invades our letterboxes and newspapers. We can't just watch a football match we have to 'experience' it. People don't just do jobs they 'facilitate' and 'function on an interpersonal level'.

I'm afraid tech heads are as guilty of this crime, and yes it should be a crime, tacking on the word 'interface' to any number of terms. And then they turn it into an acronym just to bamboozle us further. (I remember the first time I heard someone say 'we need a gooey interface' - GUI = Graphic User Interface. Tautology worsening the crime).

Horrie's example of 'Fresh Fish Sold Here' (we don't need fresh, sold, or here) reminded me of a sign that set off my bollockometer:

"Food artistry from the soul" ?! I just want a bloody bun and a cup of tea!

Clarity, succintness and the ~~bon mot~~ right ENGLISH word - its not too much to ask, is it? Apparently so. In an effort to seem more, I don't know, cultured? important? modern writing tends to select French, Latin and Greek words above good old Anglo-Saxon. It chooses metaphors over concrete terms and loves any -ism. I'm sure I'm as guilty as anyone, but there's no reason why longer words and the use of jargon and cliche should convery meaning any better. It just gives people an excuse to stop reading and understanding.

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Interviewed Alfie Dennen of moblog.co.uk and werenotafraid.com last week with David Heathfield . The first pictures of the 7/7 bombings were posted by Adam Stacey on moblog and then picked up by the BBC.

Alfie made some good points about 'citizen journalism' (a term he rejects) - it's not journalism but rather complements journalism. Technology has changed the nature of news. We can now expect witness accounts from a story can be online in a matter of minutes, with comment and analysis to follow. News blossoms outwards from the event, rather than being filtered through the angles of various corporations. While this may lead to quite a chaotic outpour of opinionated reporting, surely it's better to have access to this information than not.

Alfie cites the example of the recent Manhatten light aircraft crash. Images were uploaded to Scoopt, an agency that makes money for its users by selling them to media. They then appeared on the front of the Times.

The only aspect of this that worries me is that people might go out and newshunt if they know money can be made out of it. The accusation made of the paparrazzi at the Diana crash springs to mind. They were alledged to have taken snaps of the ex-princess while she was still alive and in need of medical help. Found this on Idiot Toys blog

I'll put up the entire interview when I reclaim my hard drive tomorrow from the smoke news team. And if you're very lucky, I'll treat you to the funky news theme I composed.

Alfie turns the tables on David and I

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Finally, I had a rather surreal moment today as I walked across the pavement in Harrow, finding this sign on the ground:

There were no harbingers of good luck in the immediate vicinity, so I looked both ways and went on my way. Perhaps cats have taken up town planning?

2006-10-10T15:06:00.000-07:00

Slipping off to conduct an interview this afternoon with a charming finance officer (something out of a Bennett play) has led to my blog being left off Westminster Journalism's list of student blogs. Well, I say list, there are three. And they're all very good.

However, I had thought an interview in the field in worth two in the virtual bush. At least I thought so. Now, having seen Epic 2015 I'm not so sure.

I have been learning Final Cut Pro all evening with a tired and patient colleague. The thought of being able to put together my first few bits of vid journalism at once excites me but also frustrates as I envisage the leads, bleeds, sweat and technology tears that lie between me and one three minute piece of ephemera.

However, the interviews I shall undertake over the next few days will prove a test of my mettle and of the willingness of myself and my colleagues to hold out hands and not stamp on heads.

DDG asked me today 'are you in a good place?' (referring to an impending online project deadline). It's interesting, David.

2006-10-09T15:34:00.000-07:00

I attended David Dunkley-Gyimah's lecture on the future of journalism last Friday at Westminster University and am glad to say it caused some furore in the cheap seats. Many students came out with the idea that what he was saying was that print is dead and if you're not with the vlogging generation, forget it.

Print's not dead, but I believe specialising in one medium is firmly four paws up. The room stank of fear, but why willingly deny yourself the knowledge and skills that might, not only secure you a job, but provide you with a completely new way of expressing yourself. I find it a relief as I'm certainly not cut out for old school journalism. My writing's fine, but not exceptional and never will be. Armed with a video camera and a handful of html, however, I might just be able to con someone that I'm better than I am.

Web writing also appeals to my innate liking of simplicity and there are millions upon millions of cluttered, ungrammatical, schoolboy spelling errors out there for me to pick apart. Paedentry isn't just a red marker pen, it's a philosophy, no....rather a watchword... a standard. I wasn't sure...but then.

What stuck in my mind from that lecture was David's closing statement: 'at the end of the day, it's all about content'. Well, allelluia. I had an epiphany. Paedentry is the perfect word for a union of youthful multimedia flash and dazzle with an obsessive eye for CLARITY and ACCURACY. Youtube's all well and good, but I wouldn't begin to call it clear.

What I believe the future of journalism looks like is the front page of google, backed with a vast archive of information and history. Think of it like a microfiche, but clear and all clearly linked up. A small magnifying glass you move around to focus in and out on layer upon layer of text, audio and video. The first layer of the onion is simple, think of those primary school books 'I am a Hindu, I am a Muslim'. Each time you clicked deeper, the information would become more detailed until you were reading dissertations on the Qur'an. Want audio, fine click here, more? less? Images? Blogs? All linked up and with their own breathing space, not squished up together on one page.

It may seem like I've strayed from my original subject, but think of this blog as a giant spidergram of my thoughts with the word 'Paedentry' at the centre. There's a branch for grammar, a branch for philosophy and a branch for a good rant.

My favourite journalist in the (fictional) world, Spider Jerusalem said anger is the best way to the truth and an obsessive nature ensures accuracy. Saving the apostrophe may be me barking up the wrong tree, but it sure gets me angry.

2006-10-04T14:55:00.000-07:00

A typical misuse of the apostrophe conveying that the hair cuts in question possess something possibly too mystical and follicular for us mere mortals to comprehend.

This kind of sign often sees me struck motionless with rage, flecking slightly at the corners of my mouth exclaiming ‘hair cut’s what?! Hair cut’s what?!’. Thankfully this particular sign was in Soho, so I went unnoticed, or at least ignored.

Why does this matter? What good are grammar, punctuation and spelling? Surely text messages, emails and the crossover of slang into broadcast media have rendered them obsolete. Why shouldn’t we write as we er you know like speak. Well, apart from the fact that correct punctuation makes something much easier to read, giving us helpful hints when to pause and breathe; and also apart from the fact that an agreed spelling of a word helps the language to travel further and is a lot less confusing to those learning it; a knowledge of accepted grammar and punctuation gives us a much wider range of expression. Armed with the knowledge of how to express ourselves formally we can switch register to suit our needs or create an impression by ignoring these rules completely. ee cummings would have far less effect with his conscious decapitalisation of the beginning of sentences if there wasn’t an accepted punctuation to provide contrast.

There is also an argument that goes: ‘we cannot think the thoughts if we have not the language to express them’. If we constrict ourselves to a flat landscape of text speak and random punctuation, which, without meaning, would quickly fall out of use, we may lose the ability to express ourselves by paring down our range of tools. After all, that’s what grammar and punctuation are: the tools to carve our words.

A bloke called Orwell saw the long term repercussions of a restriction of expression a long time ago; he called it newspeak.

2006-09-28T15:30:00.000-07:00

The very people who make the pens to make us literate wrote this genius idea down on a pukka fucking pad and sent it to the signmakers, the last checkpoint of grammatical adroitness and legibility, who approved this design cadaver.

Now, I'm aware that the 'T' is supposed to serve twice, but it looks for all the world like STAIONERY - a form of movement frugal sub atomic woodwork.

2006-09-27T16:12:00.000-07:00

Lynne Truss claims at the start of 'Talk To The Hand: Or The Utter Bloody Rudeness Of Everyday Life', that this book, or indeed her earlier grammatical pedantry in 'Eats, Shoots and Leaves' won't appeal to anyone under thirty.

However, I would like to blaze a trail for those under thirties who bristle at the sign of a misplaced apostrophe, gag at the sight of sodomised inverted commars and sob at basic spelling mistakes.

These crimes are compounded ten fold when this occurs in proper printed signs. What really kicked off this blog was the sight of an official sign in Abbey (the 'National' being discarded for the friendly girl-next-door precedent) that bore the advice 'More Cash Machine's Upstairs'. This was printed, on plastic, a REAL sign, from a pillar of the banking community.
Not only is the apostrophe misplaced, the singular has mistakanly been used making it a double stinker and driving me into a tangle headphone knot of irritation. So this blog was born. *

I had to come up with a good name for what I was. Paedant, a term describing a juvenile pedant, was the best of a bad bunch. It also has the nicely provocative edge of potentially irritating any number of vigilante Sun readers. I look forward to the inevitable hate mail address to 'you dirty paedo'.

This blog isn't just about punctuation, however. As I did my research, the abundance of bollock we allow into our lives in the form of signs accosted me at every corner. Neutral coloured plaques promising 'food experiences' or a grinning rent-a-punk advertising student accounts. Anyone who has read 'White Noise' by Don Delillo will know how this glut of information will finally seep into our brains and rewrite our thoughts bit by bit. So every now and again, I get on my elitosteed and purge this doublespeak from my life.

We kick off with a surreal titbit. Spicy Fries 'Here' . No, not really here. 'Here', as in not really here. Next door perhaps, or leading a revolution in Guatemala, just not here. 'Here'. Yes?

* it's now been taken down, presumably after complaints from a similarly outraged pedant, possibly even my perfect match. Perhaps my next endeavor will be a dating site for pedants. "Well, it's not really a date, she's not really my girlfriend, technically speaking, I think it's pronouned 'Kee - Anti'..."